Crocuta wrote:This is the session in which I did not die.
Me neither! That's never happened before. It gave the entire session a pervasive air of unreality (possibly helped by the 90 minutes of sleep I'd had the previous night).
Anyway...
Poctalon
OPFOR Alpha 2 AAR (FTL: Crocuta)
For an evening of remaining alive, this didn't get off to a promising start. The CO decided that speed was key, so we were to all load into the
RPG magnetchopper and fly around the AO until the crash site was located, at which point we would land and grab the intel before cheesing it. The gamble paid off as we were well on the way toward landing before distant enemies were sighted. Honourable Pilot Comrade Strang, deciding that getting us on the ground was the most important thing, managed to embed the Mi-8 several inches into the muddy field, ensuring that we would be walking for the rest of the encounter.
Alpha 2 was charged with securing the east of the crash/landing site while Bravo went in for the data. Crocuta, in a masterstroke of tactical judgement moved us north, away from the open field we had been assigned to secure to a wooded copse on the top of a shallow hill. It was an absolutely perfect spot, offering us cover and a commanding firing position from the east to south-west while forcing any assaulting EI to cross open fields.
It was from here that we started to blunt INDFOR's advance. Not sure if the game message warning that the data had been retrieved spurred them on, but their reckless bravery in charging forward on foot and pickup was a sight to behold. At least until we shot them in the face.
We lost Chuckles at some point but managed to bag at least a brace of the bounders each (I say, wot?). Even when we were told to disengage it was all done very professionally with the minimum of fuss and danger. And then it was "Welcome to Running Simulator 2013" as we pegged it back north as fast as we could. As previously mentioned, Mamba's running commentary on how exactly he was getting killed by our pursuers made it more interesting than it would have been otherwise, but we made it to the town in good time and the mission was called.
Hats off to Crocuta and the rest of Alpha 2. In what was to become a running theme of the evening, there was a delightful mix of teamwork and banter.
Warlords Inc
OPFOR Charlie AAR (FTL: Dabbo)
While Kefirz and Wires were having a nice cup of tea and a natter in the mosque, Charlie was assigned to hold the crossroads in the centre of town. We each jumped into different buildings and watched the horizon as BLUFOR started popping up at every point on the compass. I actually impressed myself by predicting at least two of the spots where an infidel would eventually poke his head out from behind, but to be fair they seemed less interested in hiding and more in being a conspicuous blocking force for an attack at never really reached us.
Action!FTL Dabbo decided to go on a one-man ninja mission to take out the northernmost HMMWV and left us in town, not before imparting tender words of advice along the lines of "enjoy yourself, have fun and I believe in you". Our parting cries of "Best FTL Ever!" still ringing in his ears, he headed off into the mountains and into legend.
(Seriously though, Dabbo was a bit critical of his performance but I think he did rather well. From the other AARs it seems like he unsettled BLUFOR to the point where they were not only totally distracted, but actually started killing each other in the resulting confusion. And he left us pretty well organised to make the enemy pay dearly should they ever try and take the town, so I consider it a success. In a hours-long coop mission, maybe not the best move, but this was an adversarial that was about to all go to hell so I think it was a valid choice - maybe take some AT with you next time though?
)
Anyway, some long range gunnery (or booby-trapped scone) did in glorious Warlord No1 before they'd made it past opening pleasantries, so No2 went on a highly amusing adventure. After numerous events including the heroic sacrifice of comrades Zergra and Strang, and a spot of vehicular larceny, Kefirz managed to drive to the safe haven in a purloined UAV terminal humvee thingy.
Rebound
Charlie 2 AR (FTL: Tink; AT: wash!)
Welp. It was bad enough that Charlie was pretty understrength already, and had to swap out the Charlie 1 AAR for a medic after the original incumbent DC'd, so of course command would have us marching directly down the middle of the valley towards entrenched enemy positions. Thankfully, Charlie managed to shake off the stigma of "Charlie Squad! Special Squad!" and showed a lot of great teamwork. Nothun, perhaps betraying some wishful thinking by constantly referring to us as "Charlie 3", organised an uncomplicated and effective sequence of fireteam bounding as we covered and cleared the first town (helped by Bravo's gung-ho charge down from the hillsides). Tink, giving a quiet masterclass in unruffled FTL-man-ship, kept the SL up to date on the situation as we bounded along, offering alternatives when the cover ahead wasn't all that we'd hoped for.
Once the town was cleared, we set up on the upper levels in the second building back from the western edge of town and met the counter-attack with all the bullets we had. My M249 was soon dry and I got permission to scavenge around for an enemy weapon. Not finding an RPK, I asked if a PKM was overkill and got the gratifying reply "Fuck, no".
I've never tried out the toy slots in mission before so this was my first time with a weapon like this, and once I got into the habit of ranging the effects were astonishing. Lucky too, as we'd heard that Alpha taken losses at this point, so the (intact) Charlie 1 and the battered remains of Bravo would be leading the assault. We were sent into the northern hills to prove intel and then set up fire support, which we did to terrifying effect. It was a unique feeling to be this deadly over the long distances you get in Takistan, and thanks to the superb spotting skills and marksmanship of both Tink and Wash we racked up a good number of kills between us, helping both Charlie 1 and 2 to emerge from the mission unscathed! Huzzah!
I know the latter part of the mission probably wasn't all that entertaining to those in Spectate Mode, but I have to say this was the most fun I've had in ARMA for a long time, especially thanks to Tink and Wash who kept the laughs up as we cleared the length of the valley, constantly baffled as to why we weren't dead yet
Ride of Valkyries
DC Medic (DC: Draakon)
After all the death of the previous mission, I thought it would be best to try and restore the karmic balance a bit. When we saw slawterer's death on chat we feared the worst, but Delta & Co's assault down the eastern road was a remarkably quiet affair in contrast to the AlphaBravoCharlie adventure on the other side of the valley. There was a sniper firing somewhere to the north, but that was all we heard until we took up residence on the outskirts of town.
Suddenly we had enemies close and we started to take casualties. I ran across to fix up some dudes in Echo, before hearing reports that Fer had once again forgotten how to use his legs. Grabbing the emergency copy of "My First Book of Perambulation", I charged across the open ground to Fox's position and proceeded to give a hurried lesson about how important it was to put one leg in front of the other. Sadly, not every injury was as easy to fix - greyeric had suffered some kind of horrific transporter accident that had caused him to meld with the stairs. Despite Lord Penney's desperate pleas, I could do nothing to save him, leaving us to flail around uselessly as he slowly bled out.
Suitably traumatised, I began drinking to try to forget and in doing so somehow managed to miss us actually completing the objective. All I remember is Fox fireteam assuming the role of the renegade cop who breaks the rules but gets things done:
SuperU: This is Fox, we're going to assault that HMMWV over there. It looked at us funny.
Draakon: Goddamit Fox! You stay at your post!
Draakon: Fireteams, move to the RV markers
SuperU: Copy that, Fox has already entered the centre of town and has set up a frozen yoghurt franchise
Draakon: Goddamit Fox!
SuperU: Fox is going to move up to that wall and...
Draakon: THAT'S IT! Fox, you're finished! Hand in your badge and your gun, you're off the case.
SuperU: but ... but the wall is just there, 10 metres in front us?
Draakon: I don't care
We then flew up in the chopper, and then flew down in the chopper. We were then told to get out and wait for the survivors of Alpha, but I used the opportunity to get the front seat and exclusive access to the hip flask hidden in the pilot's glove compartment. All this remaining alive had clearly given me PTSD, and if M*A*S*H had taught me anything it was that the only way to combat it is to drink heavily. Great session though!
